Look, About Lost

Alright, people keep writing to ask me about Lost. Nostradamus, they say (or Nosty, if they're my friends), if anyone can tell us what's going on with this show, it's you. What's up with this show? What's up with these numbers? And the Polar Bears?

They're right, of course. I new all about Jack and the numbers and the hatches for millions of years now. Me and the other prophesizers stood around the water cooler (we called them wells in those days) talking about all the crazy things Locke and Jack and that one hot chick and that one other hot chick would do.

So here, for those of you who are dying to know, are my spoilers for Lost.

• The next few episodes will feature flashbacks.
• The polar bears come from the North Pole.
• Locke was in the wheelchair because he couldn't walk.
• Locke is out of the wheelchair because he was able to walk again.
• Hurley is still fat because he eats more calories than he burns.
• The numbers are a plot device.