PPPPHhhhhhheeeeeewwwww!!

Sorry for the silence, but ever since I posted, I've been holding my breath to make the hiccups go away.

Can I meet Katie for that?

I've Had The Hiccups For Several Minutes Now

Oh no! I've been hiccupping for several minutes now! I can't stop hiccupping! I've had the hiccups for close to ten minutes!

I should be appearing on the Today Show tomorrow morning. Look for me! I can't wait to meet Katie Couric! Maybe she can Couric my hiccups! Ha (hic) ha!

Britney Spears Prediction Correction

Hey everybody. Nostradamus here, setting the record straight. On January 6th, I predicted on this website that Britney Spears would get divorced in 2007. I meant to say that she would get divorced from her hair.

And it only took until February!

Publisher Recalls Peter Pan Books

In an effort to capitalize on the success of the latest Peter Pan Peanut Butter recall, publishers at Disney Editions have recalled copies of the book Peter and the Shadow Thieves by Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson.

"I had no idea they were even still making Peter Pan Peanut Butter," said one Disney exec. "Now it's everywhere. I want a piece of that media action."

When asked for specifics regarding the dangers of the book, executives were evasive. "Oh, bad stuff. Really bad. Like in that movie where that girl tapped that guy on the shoulder and when he turned around his face fell off." Executives were unable to provide specifics as to the title of the movie that featured the symptoms the book can cause.

Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson could not be reached for comment, reportedly because, according to spokesmen, "They're assembling Peter Pan neon signs to place around Boston."

Crazy Astronaut Chicks Are Hot

You know what's hot? Crazy astronaut chicks! I think crazy astronaut chicks are hot! I want to meet a crazy astronaut chick and spend Valentine's Day with her! (My Valentine's Day is still open.)

Maybe I should go to Texas or Florida and meet a crazy astronaut chick! I heard there is a crazy astronaut chick in one of those places. I should meet her and drink Tang with her! Then we can drive around the country wearing diapers and try to kill people we suspect of being our romantic rivals! That would be hot!

Okay, I gotta go. I need to get to the store to buy diapers and Tang!

Ten Second Interview Of The Week: The Dixie Chicks

This week's Ten Second Interview features the Dixie Chicks, who came back from a nearly career-ending shunning by fans over their public criticisms of President Bush to sweep the Grammy's last night in every category in which they were nominated.

US: Congratulations on your five Grammy wins. Thanks so much for visiting with us today.

A DIXIE CHICK: We're glad to be here.

US: Many people are asserting that your Grammy wins have nothing to do with the quality of your music, but that this is actually a way for the music industry to show solidarity with you for your recent decline in public popularity. Some are suggesting this undermines the integrity of the Grammy's as a celebration of art, and proves it's more of an insider popularity contest. Do you think there's anything to that?

A DIXIE CHICK: Not at all. Our experience with our fans has been just the opposite. Every person in the audience at our last show responded enthusiastically.

ANOTHER DIXIE CHICK: That's right. They both gave us a standing ovation.

A Good Valentine's Day Activity

In case you missed it, here's a little taste of Valentine's Day Past.

Controversial WikiBay Site Forced To Close

SAN JOSE, CA--In the end of what site founders are calling, "A really, really good try," the entrepreneurs behind WikiBay are being forced to shut down all operations after just eight days.

The site, which attempted to combine the features of the very popular sites Wikipedia and EBay, closed amid confusion, disaster, and complaints.

The site combined the commercialism of EBay with the user-edited content of Wikipedia and other popular "wiki"-style sites.

"We overlooked a couple of things that seem really obvious in retrospect," said one founder, who spoke on the condition of anonymity. "We're hoping we do better with our idea for PriceNapster.com, where people can name their own price for music downloads."

Super Bowl Final Score Prediction

Hey everybody. It's Nostradamus, coming to you from Hawaii where I'm currently on vacation. Just thought I'd check in with my prediction for the final score of Super Bowl XLI. Due to the time difference, the game won't actually begin for about another hour.

Anyway, here you go:

Colts 29, Bears 17

Enjoy the game!

Uncertainty Over mildlyamusing.com Super Bowl Ad

In a crushing blow to the blog's financial report, uncertainty has arisen over whether CBS will air mildlyamusing.com's Super Bowl ad during the big game.

Although the blog had set aside a certain amount of shareholder cash to pay for the advertisement, CBS has not listed the website among its sponsors, nor has the ad been mentioned in any press releases.

Sources say that an unnamed mildlyamusing.com staffer was responsible for delivering the money to CBS, but as of yet, they have been unable to confirm with the network the money was ever received.

In the meantime, the company mailbox has been swamped with Red Green Show T-Shirts, Lawrence Welk CDs, mugs featuring the logo of the science program Nova, and a Masterpiece Theatre episode guide.

Win A mildlyamusing.com T-Shirt

Want to spread the word about your new favorite website, and get some free swag?

Okay, who are we kidding.

Want to spread the word about a pretty okay website, and get some free swag?

During the month of February, you can win a mildlyamusing.com T-Shirt just by telling your friends about us.

All you have to do is shoot an email out to your friends, and include us in the CC: field. We'll give you one entry for each person in the TO: field.

(Actually, put Nostradamus's email in the CC field. We're letting him administer the contest because he already knows whose going to win.)

The address to use is: manostradamus@gmail.com

Entries must be in by 11:59pm Pacific time on February 28th. The winner will be selected and notified on March 3rd, and will have 48 hours to respond. If we don't get a response in that time, we'll select another winner. That person will have 48 hours as well, and so on, until somebody gets around to writing us back.

Limit is 10 entries per person.

In the meantime, if you don't want to play the odds, or if you just have to have a shirt now, check out the store.

Good luck!