Erik Should Be Gone Instead Of My Cat
It all started when Erik, the great big jerk, told me my cat had snipes. Turns out that was all a big hoax, but it drove my cat away!
And then, my cat was kidnapped by a desperate celebrity.
Since the outpouring of love for my cat from the readers has been less than I'd hoped for, I see no other option:
Since the management of this website refused to take Erik off when I told them to, I found a solution that will get Erik off the blog, and save my cat.
I have kidnapped, Erik, and am holding him for a twelve million dollar ransom. Erik can come back when I can have my cat back.
This is no joke! Until my PayPal balance reaches twelve million dollars, I will not feed him or let him use the bathroom or anything. Don't mess with me on this one! I want my cat back!
Here's a picture of the sofa where my cat should be:
And then, my cat was kidnapped by a desperate celebrity.
Since the outpouring of love for my cat from the readers has been less than I'd hoped for, I see no other option:
Since the management of this website refused to take Erik off when I told them to, I found a solution that will get Erik off the blog, and save my cat.
I have kidnapped, Erik, and am holding him for a twelve million dollar ransom. Erik can come back when I can have my cat back.
This is no joke! Until my PayPal balance reaches twelve million dollars, I will not feed him or let him use the bathroom or anything. Don't mess with me on this one! I want my cat back!
Current Mood: Missing My Cat
Here's a picture of the sofa where my cat should be:
posted by Joe Blogger at 6:52 PM
Disclaimer: This is a satirical website. All content is intended as satire only.
3 Comments:
Joe, what are you talking about? I haven't even seen you in a couple of weeks.
I haven't even left the house today.
Dude, shut up, okay!
That's not even Erik. That's like one of those guys from CSI pretending to be Erik trying to root me out from my secret lair so they can save Erik.
It won't work, Grissom! You can't fool these readers! They're pumping dollars into my PayPal account as we speak!
Um, I just got an e-mail from Erik. He sounded fine. And I know the e-mail was from him, because he mentioned things that you wouldn't know, Joe. I don't mean to be insensitive, but maybe you should think about getting a new cat.
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